Old Habits Die Hard. I think I've somehow stumbled into a commitment that I'm not ready to take on. I have unfinished business to take care of. Old habits haunt me and make it so so hard. I'm not ready to give in. All the time energy and emotion, the loyalty and dedication, the endless build up... and now I try to abandon it all. I didn't try to abandon though. I just fell into a conflicting situation... a sort of unsaid commitment... something sweet and beautiful but also scary and unstable. Is it any surprise that the build up doesn't cease, that the anxiety and regrets of complacency are as fresh as the mornings harvest?
Surburban Surprises
As I pull into my driveway little smiling faces peek out at me from a large SUV that pulls in behind. Perfect timing for an 11:30 rendevouz with my precious neice and nephew from SoCal. I was much disappointed to hear that my late office hours made me miss their first impromptu drive by. I hop in for a few songs in the car, some games, and some showing off of my new christmas ornament and some hugs and kisses goodnight.